we now live in a society in which women speak of their uterus like that bitch owes them money. Like it is her ex husband; like it's her baby daddy; like it's her cheating boyfriend. Which is to say, all of the god damn time. I know more about my coworkers uteruses (or uteri or whatever the plural of it is cause I'm sure it was never meant to be pluralized) than I do my very own. Several of them want it removed. Several of them are getting it removed. You would think these broads would form a clique and spare the rest of us of the displeasure of experiencing their vagina every month, but oh no. Because you possess one, you must be inundated with talk of the monthly bloodletting. 10-12 days out of the month these broad shed like wounded monsters and the other 18-20 days are spent spewing how much the bloodletting hurts. Now don't misunderstand me. I know women can have very difficult and painful periods and clearly I work with most of them . . .but it is pretty fucking clear that I not only don't experience what you do, I really don't want to hear about it. One time ( I lie. Way more than once . . .) a friend at work told me of her uterus scrapping. I don't know what it is really called cause I zone out like when your parents talk about their sex life. She was catching a lot of steam and I said "you know hearing about this makes me very uncomfortable". She said "i know, but it makes me feel better". Ok uterus 1, Y'A 0.
It is at these times when I question my sexuality. Am I really a lesbian if I literally have no patience for all that is women? Hell yes i am. I'm leading the call to stop women from talking about their periods. You don't hear guys complaining about their blue balls do you? And considering you won't let me talk about the glory of a three day period sans cramps, I'm imploring you women to let society know there are two sides of the fence. All women are not possessed by monsters for most of the month. Btw, any women with a normal three day period, I'm single.
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