Cereal Monogamee

Dear serial monogamist,

Your ability to fall in love without precedence at a moment’s notice, to be completely and fully engulfed within another’s grasp, to proclaim from the mountain tops your undying love for him/her/shim/it/they is suspect.  Your bed offers an open invitation to any artsy/awkward/red-headed/blonde/dog-lover/drinker/blogger/smoker/controlling/self-loathing/short/tall/skinny/curvy/Jewish/Christian/LOST female who passes the 5 second rule. Dropped, dusted off, and consumed anyway. Can you really be THAT devoted when the vaginas pass by like a rotating sushi bar?

Signed,

Non-poly-mono-unsaturated-gamist